If you are stuck in such a situation, here is what to do.

Priya, a 28-year-old professional, has built a successful and peaceful life for herself in the city of Amanpur, away from her difficult past. Her childhood was marked by the abusive behaviour of her father, Mr. Verma, who was physically violent towards her and her sister, Anjali, and emotionally abusive towards their mother. Although her parents are now separated, they maintain a facade of being a family for social reasons, particularly concerning Anjali’s in-laws.

The current problem arises as Priya is preparing for her wedding. Pressured by her sister, she reluctantly invited Mr. Verma. True to his nature, he has already started creating conflict with close relatives, and Priya is deeply worried that he will cause a scene and harass her future in-laws during the wedding ceremonies. She feels ill-equipped to handle his confrontational behaviour and fears her special day will be ruined.

Her pleas for support from her extended family and even her sister have been met with avoidance. Anjali seems to have suppressed the memories of their traumatic childhood, and other relatives have consistently refused to intervene, even when Priya previously considered filing a domestic abuse case against him. Having already blocked Mr. Verma on all platforms and cut off contact, Priya now seeks a permanent legal solution to prevent him from interfering in her wedding and her future. Living in a different city, she is unsure of the legal steps she can take to protect herself and ensure he cannot force his presence upon her and her new family.

Advice in such cases

Navigating such a sensitive family issue requires a careful and strategic approach. Here are some immediate steps you can take:

• Document Everything: Keep a detailed record of every abusive incident, including dates, times, and what was said or done. Save threatening text messages, emails, and record phone calls if legally permissible in your jurisdiction. This documentation will be crucial evidence.
• Set Clear Boundaries: If it is safe to do so, communicate to the abusive person in writing (e.g., via a message or email that you can save) that you do not want any contact and that they are not welcome at your events. This establishes a clear record of your wishes.
• Inform Venue and Vendors: For a specific event like a wedding, inform the venue management and your security personnel about the situation. Provide a photograph of the individual and instruct them not to allow entry.
• Consult with Lawyer: The very basic and important step to start is talk to Lawyer / advocate. You should not hesitate in paying his consultation fee i.e. might be in range of Rs. 10,000 to 50,000 depends case to case. He is helping you in this situation of come out. He is expert in the domain and can help you explain the procedure which you might have never explored. A good lawyer can get the issues resolved much faster than you think.

Applicable Sections of Law

Indian law provides strong protection against domestic abuse, which is not limited to spousal abuse but extends to other family members living in a shared household.

• The Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005 (PWDVA): This is the primary civil law to seek protection from an abusive family member. A “domestic relationship” under this Act includes relationships by blood or marriage. You can file an application before a Magistrate to seek various reliefs, including:
  • Protection Order (Section 18): This is essentially a restraining order. The court can prohibit the abuser from committing any act of domestic violence, entering your place of work or residence, communicating with you in any form (personal, written, electronic), and alienating any assets.
  • Residence Order (Section 19): The court can restrain the abuser from dispossessing you from the shared household or even direct him to remove himself from it.
• Bharatiya Nyaya Sanhita, 2023 (BNS): If the abuse involves criminal acts, you can file a police complaint. Relevant sections may include:
  • Section 351 (Criminal Intimidation): For threatening you or your family with injury.
  • Sections related to Hurt or Assault: If there is any physical violence.

If you are the complainant

As the person initiating legal action, you need to be proactive and prepared.

• Gather All Evidence: Compile all the documents, messages, recordings, and a list of potential witnesses (friends, neighbours, or other relatives who are willing to support you).
• File an Application under PWDVA: You can approach a Protection Officer in your area or file a direct application with the help of a lawyer at the Magistrate’s court.
• Be Specific in Your Request: Clearly state the reliefs you are seeking. For instance, specifically request that the court bar your father from attending your wedding at the specified venue and from contacting you or your in-laws.
• Consult with Lawyer: The very basic and important step to start is talk to Lawyer / advocate. You should not hesitate in paying his consultation fee i.e. might be in range of Rs. 10,000 to 50,000 depends case to case. He is helping you in this situation of come out. He is expert in the domain and can help you explain the procedure which you might have never explored. A good lawyer can get the issues resolved much faster than you think.

If you are the victim

Your well-being is the top priority. Dealing with an abusive family member is emotionally draining, and it’s important to protect yourself.

• Prioritize Your Safety: Your physical and mental safety comes first. Do not feel guilty for cutting off a toxic family member. Your peace of mind is paramount.
• Build a Support System: Rely on trusted friends, your partner, and supportive family members who understand and validate your experience. This network is vital for emotional strength.
• Cease All Engagement: Do not respond to provocations. Block the abuser on all channels of communication. Engaging with them often fuels their behaviour.
• Consult with Lawyer: The very basic and important step to start is talk to Lawyer / advocate. You should not hesitate in paying his consultation fee i.e. might be in range of Rs. 10,000 to 50,000 depends case to case. He is helping you in this situation of come out. He is expert in the domain and can help you explain the procedure which you might have never explored. A good lawyer can get the issues resolved much faster than you think.

How the police behave in such cases

Police response to domestic issues can be inconsistent. Initially, they may view it as a “private family matter” and suggest reconciliation. However, you have legal rights. Under the PWDVA, police are obligated to inform you of your rights and assist you in filing a Domestic Incident Report (DIR). If you present a court-issued protection order, the police are legally bound to enforce it. If the abuser violates the order, it becomes a cognizable criminal offence, and the police must take immediate action, including arrest.

FAQs people normally have

What evidence is required?

Under the PWDVA, the standard of proof is the “preponderance of probabilities,” which is less strict than the “beyond a reasonable doubt” standard in criminal cases. Evidence can include:

• Your testimony.
• Testimony of witnesses (friends, relatives, neighbours).
• Electronic evidence like text messages, emails, and call recordings.
• Photographs or videos of any injuries or property damage.
• Any previous police complaints or medical reports.

How long will the investigation take?

The PWDVA is designed for speedy relief. The law mandates that the court should try to dispose of the case within 60 days of the first hearing. More importantly, the court can grant an “ex-parte ad-interim” protection order on the very first day of the hearing if it is satisfied that the abuser may commit violence. This interim order provides immediate protection while the case proceeds.

Advocate Sudhir Rao, Supreme Court of India