If you are stuck in such a situation, here is what to do.

Priya, a 32-year-old woman, found herself in a deeply distressing situation. After a five-year arranged marriage, she had to resign from her job to become the primary caregiver for her 20-month-old child, who has special medical needs requiring constant attention. Her husband, Rohan, aged 35, did not take this well. Since she stopped contributing financially, his behaviour changed. He became frustrated and controlling, often making Priya feel like a domestic helper rather than a partner.

Rohan, who is heavily influenced by his family’s opinions and has a limited social circle, began exerting immense pressure on Priya. He would emotionally manipulate her and constantly demand that she return to work, ignoring the special needs of their child. The situation escalated to a point where he frequently threatened to divorce her and take full custody of their child, using this as a tool to control her. Feeling isolated and lacking a strong support system, Priya became worried about her and her child’s future, prompting her to understand her legal rights and the steps she could take to protect herself from the constant threats and control.

Advice in such cases

Facing such a situation can be overwhelming. It is a mix of emotional turmoil and legal complexity. Here is some practical advice:

• Document Everything: Keep a detailed record of all incidents of threats, harassment, and controlling behaviour. Note down dates, times, and what was said or done. Save text messages, emails, or any other written communication that can serve as evidence.
• Secure Financials: If possible, try to secure some personal funds. Open a separate bank account in your name. This is crucial for sustaining yourself and your child during the initial phases of a legal dispute.
• Gather Important Documents: Collect all essential documents like your marriage certificate, your child’s birth certificate, your educational and professional certificates, and any joint financial or property documents.
• Do Not Act on Impulse: Your husband’s threats are likely a tactic to intimidate you. Do not make any hasty decisions like leaving the matrimonial home without legal advice, as this can sometimes be used against you.
• **Consult with Lawyer**: The very basic and important step to start is talk to Lawyer / advocate. You should not hesitate in paying his consultation fee i.e. might be in range of Rs. 10,000 to 50,000 depends case to case. He is helping you in this situation of come out. He is expert in the domain and can help you explain the procedure which you might have never explored. A good lawyer can get the issues resolved much faster than you think.

Applicable Sections of Law

In India, matrimonial and custody disputes are governed by a combination of personal and secular laws. Here are the key legal provisions:

• The Hindu Marriage Act, 1955: This Act governs divorce and maintenance. Cruelty (both mental and physical) is a ground for divorce under Section 13(1)(ia). Section 24 allows for maintenance pendente lite (during the court proceedings), and Section 25 provides for permanent alimony and maintenance.
• The Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005 (PWDVA): This is a civil law that provides protection from various forms of domestic abuse, including physical, emotional, verbal, and economic abuse. A wife can seek protection orders, residence orders, monetary relief, and custody orders under this Act.
• The Guardians and Wards Act, 1890 & The Hindu Minority and Guardianship Act, 1956: These laws govern child custody. The paramount principle followed by the courts is the “welfare of the child.” For a child below the age of five, the custody is generally given to the mother.
• Bharatiya Nyaya Sanhita, 2023 (BNS): If the husband’s cruelty is severe, it can be a criminal offence. The relevant provisions that replace Section 498A of the IPC would apply, making harassment for financial or other demands a punishable offence.

If you are the complainant

If you decide to take legal action as the complainant, here are the steps you can initiate:

• File a Petition for Maintenance: You can file a petition in the Family Court for maintenance for yourself and your child under the Hindu Marriage Act or the PWDVA. The court can order your husband to pay a monthly amount for your expenses even while the case is ongoing.
• File for Custody: You can file a petition for the sole custody of your child, citing the child’s welfare and special needs as the primary reason. Given the child’s young age, the court will likely grant you custody.
• File a Domestic Violence Case: If the threats and emotional abuse are persistent, you can file a case under the PWDVA. This can get you a protection order against your husband, a residence order securing your right to live in the matrimonial home, and monetary relief.
• **Consult with Lawyer**: The very basic and important step to start is talk to Lawyer / advocate. You should not hesitate in paying his consultation fee i.e. might be in range of Rs. 10,000 to 50,000 depends case to case. He is helping you in this situation of come out. He is expert in the domain and can help you explain the procedure which you might have never explored. A good lawyer can get the issues resolved much faster than you think.

If you are the victim

As a victim of threats and emotional abuse, your immediate priority is your well-being and safety.

• Prioritize Safety: If you feel physically threatened, ensure you and your child are in a safe place. Reach out to a trusted friend or relative if you have one.
• Build a Support Network: Even if family support is limited, try to connect with friends, support groups, or professional counsellors who can provide emotional strength during this difficult time.
• Avoid Confrontation: Do not engage in heated arguments about the threats. Stay calm and focus on gathering evidence and seeking legal advice.
• **Consult with Lawyer**: The very basic and important step to start is talk to Lawyer / advocate. You should not hesitate in paying his consultation fee i.e. might be in range of Rs. 10,000 to 50,000 depends case to case. He is helping you in this situation of come out. He is expert in the domain and can help you explain the procedure which you might have never explored. A good lawyer can get the issues resolved much faster than you think.

How the police behave in such cases

Approaching the police in matrimonial disputes can be a mixed experience. Typically, when a complaint of this nature is made, the police may first refer the couple to the Crime Against Women (CAW) Cell or a mediation centre for counselling, aiming for reconciliation. They are often hesitant to file a First Information Report (FIR) immediately in matrimonial cases unless there is clear evidence of a serious cognizable offence like physical violence. However, if you file a complaint alleging cruelty under the BNS with specific instances and evidence, they are mandated to conduct a preliminary inquiry and register an FIR if a case is made out. Under the PWDVA, the police are obligated to assist the Protection Officer and help the victim file a Domestic Incident Report (DIR).

FAQs people normally have

Can my husband legally take my child away from me just because he is earning?

No. In India, the father’s financial superiority is not the sole factor in deciding custody. The court’s primary consideration is the child’s welfare. The “tender years doctrine” strongly presumes that a mother’s care is essential for a young child, especially one with special needs. A threat to take custody is often just an intimidation tactic.

Am I entitled to maintenance if I resigned from my job willingly?

Yes. You are entitled to maintenance for yourself and your child. The fact that you resigned, especially to care for a child with medical needs, will be considered by the court. The court will assess your husband’s income and your needs to decide a reasonable amount of maintenance.

Are constant threats of divorce and emotional manipulation considered “cruelty”?

Yes. The Supreme Court of India has repeatedly held that cruelty is not just physical. Persistent mental and emotional harassment, threats, and creating an environment of fear and control constitute mental cruelty, which is a valid ground for divorce and for seeking relief under domestic violence laws.

What evidence is required?

Strong evidence is key to a successful legal case. You should try to collect:

• Digital Communication: Text messages, WhatsApp chats, emails, and call recordings where threats or abuse have occurred. (Note: Admissibility of recordings can be complex, so consult your lawyer).
• Witness Testimony: Statements from friends, neighbours, or family members who may have witnessed the harassment or know about your situation.
• Medical Records: Your child’s medical documents are crucial to prove their special needs and the necessity of your role as a full-time caregiver.
• Financial Documents: Your husband’s salary slips, bank statements, and income tax returns to establish his income for maintenance claims.
• A Personal Diary: A detailed journal documenting incidents of cruelty and threats can be submitted as supporting evidence.

How long will the investigation take?

The timeline varies significantly based on the legal path you choose. If an FIR is filed under the BNS, the police investigation and filing of a chargesheet can take anywhere from 60 to 90 days, or sometimes longer. However, court proceedings are separate and take much more time. A contested divorce case can take several years to conclude. Fortunately, the law provides for interim relief. You can get an order for interim maintenance and interim custody within a few months of filing your case, providing immediate financial support and security for your child while the main case proceeds.

Advocate Sudhir Rao, Supreme Court of India